No swipe for you! Come back one year!

I got the Cola Wars

I question the fuckin’ part. Don’t think he’s getting laid.

I’ll start my own amusement park with blackjack and hookers. In fact, forget the blackjack.

No Earthbound?

The parking spot is where you stop the sliding.

Pharaoh my God king, you are cold and deceased

It’s the one where Scruffy gets a $300 haircut.

We don’t even get gruel, just Krusty brand imitation gruel. 9 out of 10 orphans can’t tell the difference.

Where are the cavemen?

It’s basically for the same reason stores charge $19.99 instead of $20.

Did Garfield eat lasagna again?

I don’t care about the voter apathy party.

1. He’ll say that he did it

2. The media will treat it as gospel

3. People will believe it

Not listed: prices actually coming down

Does anyone really know what time it is?

This idea is good and you should feel good.

No person who makes random Simpsons references? Gee, I hope somebody got fired for that blunder.

Sometimes it’s the ones you most suspect.

Did he blame the Jews again?

I like the way Nitup thinks.